RUSHING! KILLER SPAM SCAM PORN FLOOD APPROACHING!

Hold on tight, folks, because a massive tsunami of spam is about to slam down on your inbox. We're talking disgusting amounts of scammy emails packed with vile porn. These losers are trying to cheat you out of your hard-earned cash, so be super cautious. Don't click on any links in these emails, and report them immediately. Don't get caught!